03.13.10
It’s SPRINGTIME!!!!
IT’S SPRINGTIME!!!!!! Are you excited or worried at your cemetery?
April 26, 2009 on 4:39 am In Sound Off No Comments
A subject not often approached, is the attitude in cemeteries when springtime finally rolls around. It’s no longer cold, the snow and ice are gone, the trees are coming alive, the grass is turning green, it just seems like the good Mother Earth is coming alive once again. A reason to feel excited, unless you have done a poor job of preparing for it.
You may be thinking, “what in the heck is this about”?
It’s simple. Along with all the beauty that comes with spring, also comes all the visitations by family and friends to your cemetery grounds. They come and leave decorations, figurines, and many other momentos on the graves of those they dearly miss. Many of these folks have not been able to get out to the cemetery for months, due to the road conditions or weather. So they are coming out in force this time of year. So what is wrong with this, you may ask? Nothing would be my response, as long as you have kept EVERY LOT OWNER UP TO DATE WITH THE FLORAL RULES AND REGULATIONS OF YOUR CEMETERY.
Why the caps on this? Already, I have responded to three articles this spring, regarding families upset about cemetery floral rules and missing items from graves. In these articles, the families feel disregarded and the cemetery feels the families are being unreasonable. In one article out of Michigan, families stated they picked a particular municipal cemetery over others in the area, simply for their lack of rules on the matter. Now guess what. Someone has complained about how messy the place looks, and the city has decided to either enforce non existant rules, make new rules and enforce them, or just clean the place up. Whichever case it is, communications was obviously not existant! And the latest out of Kentucky, where the rules and regulations HAVE been in force, with posted signs in the cemetery and still they are taking hits from the client families because those posted rules and regulations have not been enforced consistently in the past. It’s a delicate balance, enforcing rules and continuing to satisfy the needs of your client families. It seldom is comfortable for either side, but it is necessary.
I have personally witnessed for years, a fairly sizeable lack of concern for passing out floral regulations in cemeteries. The Family Service Counselors or Cemetery Sales Staff are asked to pass these rules out to every family they sell cemetery property to, whether it is on a preneed or atneed basis. I can tell you, it just doesn’t happen on any level of consistency. The Family Service folks don’t get paid to do this, they are generally commission only. In order to make commissions, they have to sell stuff. They can’t sell stuff (they think), if they push rules and regulations on people. That is #1 in this perennial problem. Problem #2, is when it is known they don’t pass these out regularly, it isn’t seen to it that someone else does.
Now, it really hurts to be on the maintenance crew. They are out in the cemetery, maintaining the grounds. They make little money, and are charged with the task of making the cemetery look nice at all times. They have to perform burials, and keep the area safe at all times, as well. They take the initial flak for the missing items from gravesites, most times accused of being the ones to steal the items. Items that are hardly of value to anyone beyond the families that left them for their loved ones. If they are leaving things of real value, then what do they expect? These are public thoroughfares, and valuables will disappear if left in plain site. That is seldom the case though.
My wish for the spring of 2009 & now 2010? Everyone get along. Everyone talk to each other. If there is a problem, go to the management and speak with them in a tone that would cause everyone to want to make things right. Management team, do the same. Family Service, don’t sherk this duty of passing out the regs. It is critical to the emotional well being of the families you make a living from serving. Maintenance, if you see an item that looks like it is valuable, talk to your manager about possibly boxing or bagging the item respectfully and tagging it with the deceased name and storing for a period of time so the family can retrieve it intact. The largest complaint I hear from families is when they find their items in a “pile” in the back of the cemetery. Bottom line, they feel they and their departed loved one have been disrespected. Everyone working in the cemetery has the ability to positively impact that perception.
That is my wish. In 2009 and now 2010 let’s all do a better job of communicating our needs and expectations. In 2009 and now 2010 let’s start the process of eliminating the spring time blues. Spring time should be a time of great joy, it’s so much more beautiful out than a month ago. It is up to us all to keep it that way, and together we can do it.
Have a Great Spring!!!!!
I have reprinted this post over the years in the hopes of finding common ground between all the parties involved in cemeteries. Still, the news agencies report upset families and the cemetery shows reluctance to fully speak to the media about the reasons for removing decorations in the early spring. There are many valid reasons to perform this clean up, the least of which is appearance. The first and formost reason is safety, but seldom do you hear this spoken about. Why? Unless the cemetery being complained about has suffered a legal loss due to personal inury from flying debris or read about another, they just don’t talk about it. I hope the instance of media events on cemetery spring cleanup drops this year. I hope communications improves among the interested parties. It’s a new day and I hope for a new way.
